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Thursday, June 12, 2008

Apparently, in Oprah?s view, instructing the general public on what books to buy, what diets to try, what movies to watch, and what cars to drive, pales in comparison to telling people what candidate to vote for; namely, Mr. Obama.
Over the past 20 years, Oprah?s morphed from everyone?s favorite sister - with the self deprecating wit and the boyfriend who won?t commit - to everyone?s overbearing mother - complete with an endless list of your current shortcomings, and dopey advice for your love life. I guess being the self-elected spokeswoman for all women - and a billionaire - just isn?t as fulfilling as one would think. Having the Queen of All Media explain why I should vote for ?any? candidate is like having the Queen of England give me housecleaning tips; it?s unwanted and unappreciated advice from the uninformed.
Only in America, could someone like Oprah reach the apex of financial success and cultural clout - where her very name becomes a brand - without being born into royalty, never-mind poverty. It?s more than a little disingenuous to suggest that Oprah?s the victim -or victor- of anything other than a lazy public, who like affable women with weight issues and boyfriends who refuse to pop the question. She?s like Barbara Streisand in her Jon Peters phase.
If Oprah reminds everyone of their favorite girlfriend, then Hillary reminds you of your worst lover. She was impossible to ignore when you first met her -and impossible to get rid of once you did. She?s like my morning martini: strong, chilled and bitter. If Streisand can rework the lyrics of ?Happy Days are Here Again? to something that includes free health care, higher taxes and Bill Clinton in the Lincoln bedroom - it just might get some air play on NPR.
As wacky as these endorsements are, Vera?s still reeling over Sean Penn endorsing Mr. Kucinich. As if once being married to Madonna isn?t enough material for a lifetime of jokes and snickering, Mr. Penn now has a fetish for dwarfs and dictators. Apparently leaky boats and lazy thinking have turned Mr. Penn from acting foolish into a foolish actor. I was actually betting he was going to endorse Hugo Chavez, but I think Danny Glover beat him to it.
Personally, I?m waiting to see who Liza Minelli endorses - only because I'm curious what the prescription drug benefit would consist of?.

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